Kylie Minogue’s Disco

Gays come in different colors, shapes and sizes. However one common bond we Cher seems to be our love affair with divas. Every gay seems to have one (or in my case, an army) they will follow to the ends of the Earth. Kylie Minogue has reached gay icon status with rabid fans worshiping at her Golden alter but I’ve just never been that into her.

Kylie first pinged my gaydar with her song “Loco-motion” back in the 80’s. It was super cheezy fun and I had some fierce chuga-chuga moves back in the day but I just couldn’t jump on board back then.

A couple decades later, “Can’t Get You Out Of My Head” was everywhere and I couldn’t get her off my radio. The futuristic video was ahead of it’s time with it’s Handmaid’s Tale fashion. Blessed be the fruits that followed her but not this one.

Returning like a twenty year comet, Kylie’s new album Disco approached my stratosphere last week. I’m blaming it on the pandemic or FOMO, but I decided to listen to my very first Kylie Minogue album. Was Kylie going to do a retro album, which was my hope, or was this a Hustle trying to entice me into another run-of-the-mill dance album?

Disco entertainingly takes some samples and lyrics from songs from the 70’s but takes the majority of it’s moves from the modern Gay Diva Icon’s Handbook. Auto-Tune Kylie’s voice to almost unrecognizable limits (why didn’t someone tell me Madonna had a new album out?), computerize the musicians for that canned Rupaul sound and make it campy enough for a drag queen to lip-sync atop (or abottom depending on preference) any gay bar. This is definitely a love letter to her gay admirers, sealed with a kiss and stamped with her clubbing sound.

In my gay opinion, Kylie is the guacamole of the music industry, an aquired taste. Some places, she is everywhere and adored. Some people treat her like a rare delicacy, worthy of an up-charge. While some people, like myself, will prefer to leave her on the table turning brown while diving into the salsa instead.

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