Christmas

In my gay opinion, Christmas is just like any other day of the year, the only difference is I get two extra days off from work that don’t count against my vacation days. Now that is something worth celebrating.

Christmas makes me feel bad for the people who stress the meal prep and who start shopping in May to get just the right gift for everyone on their list. Poor things don’t realize Chinese take-out restaurants are open and most of the gifts end up being returned or regifted. This year I broke the world record for the quickest regift. I opened a gift just as our old neighbor was pulling in our driveway with a gift for us but we didn’t have one in return. I returned the gift back it’s gift bag, took off my name tag, and had it ready to go before the ex-neighbor rang our doorbell. Merry Christmas, I hope you like it…more that I didn’t.

I also feel bad for the people who don’t have someone to spend the holidays with, if that’s important to them. That’s something I don’t understand since I’d be content to settle down for the night for a threesome with Ben & Jerry while watching cheezy Hallmark movies on Netflix. But other people get lonely and so much pressure is put on the holiday to feel merry and bright but what if you just want to relax in your pjs with your face shoved in a pint of non-dairy dessert? I just wish I could tell the world that that’s ok. Hell it’s better than ok, Heaven Is A Place On Earth…it’s everything Belinda Carlisle sang about and more.

So in celebration of the end of 2019 and my final monthly second-a-day video, welcome to my December.

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